Who decides whether you shall be happy or unhappy? The answer – you do! A happy old man was asked on T.V how he managed to be so happy (his wonderful secret of happiness). He only answered “No, I haven’t any great secret. It’s just as plain as the nose on your face. When I get up in the morning,” he explained, “I’ve two choices – either to be happy or to be unhappy, and what do you think I do? I just choose to be happy, and that’s all there is to it.”

That may seem an oversimplification, and it may appear that the old man was superficial, but let’s recall that Abraham Lincoln, whom nobody could accuse of being superficial, said that people were just used about as happy as they made up their minds to be. You can be unhappy as you want to be. It is the easiest thing in the world to accomplish. Just choose unhappiness. Go around telling yourself that things aren’t going well, that nothing is satisfactory and you can be quite sure of being unhappy. But say to yourself, “things are going nicely. Life is good. I choose happiness,” and you can be quite certain of having your choice.

In the world we live in today, we believe that success is happiness and that seed is grown in our young minds. Don’t get me wrong, we all love the wonderful things about life, but what I am trying to say here is that we can amass as much wealth as we can, but happiness comes in different ways. One can be wealthy and not healthy. Now tell me how can that individual find happiness? He or she would be more than glad to trade all his or her wealth for health, isn’t that rather pathetic? Happiness cannot be bought, but fulfillment can be attained from wealth or respect from others. You can ride around town the biggest and slickest car there ever is and feel fulfilled, yes of course fulfillment counts and it could be mistaken for happiness. Most mistake it for happiness, but it is believed that there is a thin line between them. It is like a man who wants a son so badly, then boom he has one and he was the fulfilled father who was able to meet up to expectations in the African society. But as the years went by, the son proved to be the worst nightmare he had ever had and unhappiness began to settle in. In some tribes in the Gambia, some believe that so many children, wives, cows and wealth is the only way to define success and happiness.

But being the young and of course success searching girl I am, I asked my psychology lecturer at the university of the Gambia, Dr. Sidibeh in the middle of the class, not for once blinking about disturbing or taking him off balance (since he was teaching something quite different then in psychology) what he could describe as success and happiness? The whole class looked at me like I was from the dustbin, but just like the psychologist he was, Dr. Sidibeh was more than glad to help a young girl from the desert of ignorance. In his own words, success can be seen in different ways, like I have mentioned above, but success he believes is happiness and fulfillment. He said it is not all about wealth since wealth could go away, but health, fulfillment and happiness are the recipes of success, but then again he said it depends on my view about success, since we all are entitled to our views and beliefs. And from that day, I began having a different view about success and happiness. One important thing, do not allow people to determine your happiness, because the bottom is crowded. We all are busy going to the top, some of us won’t mind stepping or trampling on your happiness just for our selfish reasons.

Say for instance, you just bought some shoes and some minutes or hours later you are stressed for some reason, bring out those shoes and parade them in your house just because you become happy when you wear them. All I am saying is that we can find happiness in the little things we take for granted. Ask a child what makes him or her happy and he or she will have nothing to say, because you know what? There are a lot of things they appreciate and it makes them glow and grow everyday. Make a child to laugh and laugh with him or her, don’t be tired and you will see the difference. Try that and see.

When stretching on your bed in the morning or the moment you see a new day through your window, tell yourself that this is going to be a wonderful day, you are going to tackle everything that comes your way. And that everything is a piece of cake. You will feel good physically, mentally and emotionally. It is wonderful to be alive.

The way to happiness: keep your heart free from worry. Live simply, expect little, and give much. Fill your life with love. Scatter sunshine. Forget self, think of others. Do as you would be done by. Try this for a week and you will be surprised.

Expect the best and get it.

Learn the magic of believing. If you expect the worst then it will get worst, and if you expect the best you will get the best out of life. In so doing you bring everything into the realm of possibility. Like what Sam Adeyemi of success power usually says “success is who you are.”

I appreciate the readers of this page who usually give me pats on my backs. And as a youth who loves sharing with others, I would love to know your views and comments and even interesting topics you believe can help us all if published. You can do this by sending an email to isatoudumbuya29@yahoo.com or through the Paper’s thepoint13@yahoo.com. I will be more than glad to receive your comments and contributions.